Dear Daughters, Don't Run Someone Else's Race

Dear H, P, and E,

When I was growing up, social media wasn't part of everyday life the way it is today. Now, it has a profound influence on how we see ourselves, whether we like it or not.

We see someone with a seemingly "perfect" life, and we often fail to consider how much of what we're seeing has been carefully edited. The person on the other side of that screen may have spent hours choosing what to show and leaving out what they don't find desirable.

But I don't want to pretend that people didn't compare themselves to others when I was growing up. Of course they did. But today, it feels different.

As I watch the three of you grow up, I wonder what the world will look like when you read this someday. I hope and pray that the pressure to measure yourselves against others will be less than it is today, but I can't say I'm confident that it will be.

Girls, I don't want you to spend your lives comparing yourselves to others.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Maybe when you read this, you're in college. Maybe you're married and raising children of your own. Perhaps you'll see someone further along in their academic journey and begin to consider yourself a failure. Or maybe you'll see another family whose children seem better behaved than yours on that particular day.

I'm not sure what circumstances you'll find yourselves in, but whatever they may be, I want to implore you to resist the temptation to compare.

I know that's easier said than done.

We are bombarded by so many influences today, and sometimes maintaining your identity and being content where God has placed you can be a difficult stand.

But stand you must, or you risk being robbed of the joy found in the present.

Scripture reminds us that "godliness with contentment is great gain" (1 Timothy 6:6).

Now, I don't want you to misunderstand me. Contentment doesn't mean you shouldn't strive to improve your circumstances. If there is something worthwhile that you can pursue to improve your life, I encourage you to pursue it diligently.

The Apostle Paul understood this well. In Philippians 4, he tells us that he had learned to be content in whatever circumstances he found himself. Whether he had plenty or very little, his contentment rested in Christ rather than in what he possessed.

But don't measure your progress by someone else's race.

It's a race you will never win.

Think about driving on the interstate.

H, I know how much you hated being on the interstate as a kid. Ha!

But think about it. There is always someone ahead of you on the interstate. No one ever really "wins."

That's what life can be like sometimes.

You'll see people pulled over on the side of the road with a flat tire, while others seem to be speeding ahead without a care in the world. Nothing ever seems to get in their way.

And perhaps you'll become discouraged because your own car simply can't go as fast as theirs.

But here's something I want you to remember. You don't know where everyone else is going, what they've been through, or what troubles might be waiting for them down the road.

And their journey is not yours.

Please remember to breathe and take life one day at a time.

Don't spend your life racing after things that will perish. Focus on God, and love and care for the people He has placed in your life.

And if any of you are reading this while going through a particularly difficult season, I want you to remember something.

I'm proud of you.

You can do this. Don't give up.

Pray, meditate on God's Word, and take things one day at a time.

Your Papa loves you.